I am here to inform you that Steve Goodman no longer holds the title to writing the perfect country music and western song. I do. Yes, for over 30 years, David Allen Coe's rendition of "You never even call me by my name" was the King of all Country and Western songs. But my song, "John Belushi's Still Alive!", is now the perfect country and western song. Here's why: Goodman's song fails to mention Wrigley Field and The Chicago Cubs, as mine does. His song fails to mention having to roll your own cigarettes and drinkin' the cheapest whiskey, rum and gin, as mine does. His song fails to mention bib overalls and pickup trucks, or John Deere tractors on Lake Shore Drive, as mine does. His song doesn't say anything about Telluride, Colorado, or ski lifts, as mine does. Moreover, his song doesn't say anything about graveyards, or smoking pot, or palm trees in the sand, or beaches, or Waikiki, as mine does. Above all, Goodman's song doesn't say anything about John Belushi, and how he's still alive, as my song does.